A wry view of life for the world-weary

Bank Notes Of The Week


Love ‘em or hate ‘em – and some vegans have objected to the use of animal fat in their production – the new £5 plastic note jobbies are here to stay.

A micro-engineer from Birmingham, Graham Short, has made a modification to the design, however, I learned this week, by engraving a 5mm portrait of Jane Austen in the transparent part of four of the notes – serial numbers AM 32 885551 to 4, if you are interested – and including a different quote from her oeuvre on each note. They have an insurance value of £50,000, so are worth looking out for.

Doubtless to piss vegans off further, Short has spent them in a café in Caerphilly, a pork pie shop in Melton Mowbray, a bakery in Kelso and is due to get rid of the last one in Northern Ireland. If you find one, and at least the one spent in Melton Mowbray is in circulation, you are urged to contact the Tony Huggins-Haig gallery in Kelso who have sponsored the caper.

Ever ones to pour a bucket of cold water on a jape like this, the Bank of England warn that it is an offence under the Currency and Banknotes Act of 1928 to deface a note of the realm.

Bah humbug, I say, Happy hunting!


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