Fart Of The Week (10)

New Zealand and the British seem to be poles apart when it comes to farting. The Kiwi Prime Minister, Jacinda Arden, has recently announced plans to tax farmers for the burps and farts of their livestock, due to the huge contribution they make to climate change. “This is an important step forward in New Zealand’s transition to a low emissions future and delivers on our promise to price agricultural emissions from 2025, she parped.

Over in Britain, however, a recent survey has revealed that one in eight of us want to be able to fart more freely in public without getting glared at by those unfortunate enough to be nearby. Liverpudlians were the most fervent champions of this freedom with 22% claiming that it was “natural” to emit gas and that it should be accepted.

This follows some research conducted in 2020 by The Collective Dairy who found that the average Briton farts 15 times a day with the citizens of Oxford the most flatulent with an average of 23, closely followed (although not too closely) by Leeds with 22 and Norwich with 21. 38% of those polled admitted to trying to hold farts in while 13% covered them up with a cough. It also revealed that the average Brit burps 10 times a day, while only 40% cover their mouth with their hand while doing so.

Whoever the Chancellor of the Exchequer is today, perhaps they could consider closing the fiscal gap by taking a leaf out of the New Zealanders’ book by taxing the British flatulence.


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