What do people heating their homes and wrapping paper have in common this Christmas?
They both are getting ripped off.
How can you keep your home warm this Christmas?
Tinsulation.
What is the best Christmas present ever?
A broken drum. You can’t beat it.
Why are the Government having problems with their own version of the Christmas Nativity?
They can’t find three wise men.
What crisps did Phil and Holly serve at their Christmas party?
Skips.
Why does Kate Bush need to turn off the heating?
She’s running up that bill
Why didn’t Will Smith and Chris Rock have turkey this Christmas?
Because they’ve got beef.
Why has Santa been banned from sooty chimneys?
Carbon footprints
What is the difference between Rishi Sunak and a shepherd?
One U-turns and the other turns ewes.
What is an ig?
An igloo without a toilet.
Merry Christmas.
What type of peas ruin Christmas dinner?
MPs
How does King Charles III sign his Christmas cards?
The artist formerly known as Prince
Have a good Christmas.
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