Doctors were left shell-shocked when an 88-year-old man turned up at the Hôpital Sainte Musse in Toulon with an unusual complaint; he had an eight-inch long First World War artillery shell stuck up his anus which, he claimed, he had inserted for pleasure His arrival prompted a call for bomb disposal personnel, the evacuation of the adult and paediatric emergency unit, and the diversion of incoming emergencies.
Once the authorities had satisfied themselves that the shell was not live, they proceeded to remove the two-inch wide shell by performing abdominal surgery. As one doctor remarked, “it rarely comes out from where it comes in”.
The man, unnamed to spare his blushes although red cheeks were the least of his problems, was recovering well and said to be in good health.
You have to take your pleasures where you can, I suppose.