Tag Archives: Kerry Smith

Christmas Crackers


Ukippers – don’t you just love them! The British political landscape would be all the poorer without them. Some of their highlights this year.

  • The flooding and storms of last winter were divine retribution for gay marriage, according to David Silvester, a town councillor in Henley;
  • Foreign aid, blustered former UKip MEP Godfrey Bloom, was being sent to bongo bongo land;
  • According to Kerry Smith, a former candidate for the constituency of South Basildon and East Thurrock, some of his party members were poofters;
  • Women have no ambition, according to another UKip MEP, because babies get in the way;
  • And, talking of babies, ostentatious breast-feeding in Claridges of all places really got on Nigel’s tits
  • Natasha Bolter’s academic qualifications proved not to be what they were claimed to be and it seems Roger Bird didn’t;
  • Too many Romanians with their bullock carts are blocking Britain’s major arterial motorways, according to Nigel. Can’t say I’ve noticed them myself.

I don’t know where Ukippers went for their pre-internet porn but they seem to have this thing about homosexuals and animals. According to Julia Gasper (great name!), former chair of the Oxford branch, some homosexuals prefer sex with animals and this week John Rees-Evans, a candidate for Cardiff South and Penarth, claimed that a gay donkey tried to have sex with his horse.

To think they may hold the balance of power!